Zombie Girl at the Deep End

By third period AP Chem, I was definitely a zombie. Not the cool, Netflix kind with dramatic makeup and a tragic backstory. The lame kind—dead eyes, shuffling feet, existing on caffeine and spite alone.

"You forgot your vitamin again," Maya whispered, sliding a neon orange gummy bear across my desk. Like that one chemical compound could fix seventeen years of existential dread.

I swallowed it anyway. Because that's what good zombie girls do.

Swim practice was the only time I felt almost alive. The water swallowed everything—the AP pressure, my mom's texts about college applications, the way Jason looked right through me in the hallway like I was literally transparent. Under the surface, the world went muffled and distant, all blue and weightless and mine.

Until Tyler started swimming laps next to me.

Tyler, who'd transferred three weeks ago with sleeves of tattoos and a reputation for getting expelled from his last school. Tyler, who definitely wasn't supposed to be smiling at me like that while doing backstroke.

"You're pretty fast," he said, shaking water from his hair like some rom-com cliché. "For someone who looks half-dead on land."

I blinked. Chlorine stung my eyes. "I'm channeling zombie energy. It's my aesthetic."

He laughed, actually laughed, and something in my chest did a backflip. "Mine too. Nice to meet my people."

We ended up sitting at the edge of the pool until the coach kicked us out, talking about everything and nothing. His mom was a pharmacist (hence the vitamin expertise, apparently). He'd gotten expelled for hacking his school's grading system. He thought my zombie vibes were "lowkey iconic."

"You're not actually dead though," he said, serious for the first time. "I can tell."

The water lapped against the tiles, rhythmic and real. For the first time in months, I didn't feel like I was faking being alive.

"Yeah," I said, and meant it. "I think I'm figuring that out."

My vitamin gummy sat untouched in my swim bag. Some things, you can't supplement. Some things, you have to learn to float through on your own.