The Suppository

Gerald stood in the pharmacy aisle, reading the back of a bottle that promised to restore what thirty years of middle management had taken from him. The vitamin supplement—fortified with something that sounded like a chemical weapon—cost forty-nine dollars.

"You're not actually buying that, are you?" Elena stood behind him, cart filled with sensible things: whole grain bread, organic milk, fresh spinach. Her hair was pulled back in that way that made her look simultaneously severe and breathtakingly beautiful.

"It's supposed to help with—energy," he said, which was not what the bottle promised but what he desperately needed.

"You know what helps with energy?" She picked up a bunch of spinach, inspecting it like it might hold the answers to their failing marriage. "Sleep. Exercise. Not staying at the office until ten PM convincing yourself that this time, the promotion will fix everything."

Gerald felt his palm sweating against the plastic bottle. They'd had this conversation before. He'd started bringing work home. She'd started making dinner for one, then eating alone when he texted he'd be late. Now she moved through their house like a ghost haunting her own life.

"There's a conference," he said. "Palm Springs. Next week. I could—"

"Go to Palm Springs without me?" Elena laughed, but it wasn't funny. "Sure, Gerald. Go to Palm Springs. Attend your workshops on 'synergy' and 'optimization.' Come back with a tan and another bottle of vitamins. Tell me how much closer you are to being the person you think you're supposed to be."

She dropped the spinach into her cart with deliberate care.

"I'm doing this for us," he said, and even as the words left his mouth, he recognized them as the lie they'd become.

"Are you?" She touched his arm, her palm cool against his skin. "Or are you doing it because you're terrified that if you stop running, you'll realize you don't actually know where you're going?"

The vitamin bottle felt suddenly heavy. Gerald watched her walk away, her cart squeaking slightly against the pharmacy floor, and understood with devastating clarity that some supplements can't fix what's actually broken.