The Spinach Incident

The fluorescent lights of the grocery store hummed against the Thursday night boredom. Marcus adjusted his backwards cap, scanning the cereal aisle like he had somewhere important to be. He didn't.

"You're doing it again," said Jordan, sliding up beside him with a shopping basket half-full of energy drinks and frozen pizza. "The thing where you act like you're not a complete mess."

Marcus adjusted his hat. "I'm not a mess. I'm mysteriously complex."

"You have spinach in your teeth."

Marcus froze. "Since when?"

"Since you tried to impress Jordan Taylor at lunch by pretending you knew about crypto." Jordan grinned, all teeth and zero mercy. "She nodded along, by the way. Very polite of her."

"You're the worst friend I've ever had," Marcus said, but his face was already burning.

"That's why we're here." Jordan gestured vaguely toward the frozen foods. "Emotional support shopping. Also, my little sister's birthday is Saturday and she wants this ridiculous bear cake. I don't know how to bake. You do."

"I made cookies once."

"They were raw."

"They were artisanal."

Jordan's iPhone buzzed. She checked it, face dropping. "Oh."

"What?"

"Jordan Taylor just posted a story." Jordan tilted the screen toward him. There it was — a boomerang of Marcus gesturing enthusiastically with spinach between his front teeth, captioned: "When boys explain crypto but can't explain basic dental hygiene."

Marcus stared at it. The humiliation should have been devastating. Instead, he started laughing. Not a little laugh. The kind that bent you double and made your eyes water.

"What?" Jordan demanded, but she was smiling.

"It's just..." Marcus gasped. "I was so worried about being cool that I forgot to be normal. Who explains crypto to someone they're trying to impress?"

"You, apparently."

"Me, apparently." He straightened his hat. "So. About this bear cake."

"We're gonna need a lot of spinach," said Jordan, linking her arm through his. "For emotional damage recovery purposes."

"You're literally planning to buy spinach right now."

"I'm buying it because my mom keeps sending me articles about iron deficiency, and if I come home with it one time, maybe she'll stop forwarding me wellness newsletters."

"Deal. But we're making the bear cake first."

"Obviously." Jordan grabbed a bag of frozen spinach. "Priorities."

Marcus followed her toward the checkout, adjusting his hat, and thought maybe being a mess wasn't the worst thing you could be. At least he had witnesses.