The Goldfish Monologues

Maya's first day as a freshman felt like walking into a lion's den—except the lions were wearing varsity jackets and the den smelled like AX body spray and anxiety. She'd spent forty-five minutes on her eyeliner, only for her hands to shake so badly she looked vaguely raccoon-ish. Her older brother Jay had dubbed her 'little bear' since she was tiny (he claimed she growled in her sleep), but right now? She felt more like a confused, caffeinated squirrel.

At lunch, she ended up at the table with the theater kids, which honestly seemed like a win until Lucas, a sophomore with tragic hair, started dramatically reciting lines about the Sphinx of Giza for the fall production. 'The riddle isn't just what walks on four legs then two then three,' he proclaimed, gesturing with a breadstick. 'The REAL riddle is whether any of us actually knows who we're supposed to be.'

Maya found herself nodding like this was deep instead of incredibly pretentious. That's when Sarah, the junior playing the lead, leaned in. 'You're coming to the party tonight, right? At Tyler's house?'

Tyler. The Tyler who'd supposedly hooked up with half the sophomore class. The Tyler whose Instagram was just shirtless mirror pics. 'I... think so?'

'Perfect.' Sarah's grin felt predatory. 'You can be our lookout.'

The party turned out to be less 'epic high school experience' and more 'fifty people in a basement while someone's parents were allegedly at a cabin.' Maya was pressed against a wall, nursing lukewarm punch, when someone bumped into her—hard. Spinach dip splattered her new white tee. Not just any spinach dip. This was the legendary spinach artichoke disaster from the buffet table, now a green catastrophe across her chest.

Before she could process this humiliation, a senior appeared beside her. 'Rough night, bear?'

Maya practically jumped out of her skin. It was Alex, who'd been in her bio class last year. Cute Alex. The one who'd helped her with the fruit fly lab while making jokes about how their specimens had more game than either of them.

'Bear?' she managed.

'Your brother called you that at graduation. I was sitting behind him.' He handed her a napkin. 'Also, full disclosure? I'm the one who bumped you. I was being chased by Tyler, who's apparently convinced I hooked up with his ex. Which, for the record, I did not.'

'This night is officially a bull ride from hell,' Maya muttered.

Alex laughed—actually laughed, not the fake laugh she'd been doing all night. 'Want to get out of here? My goldfish needs feeding anyway.'

'Seriously?'

'Deadly serious. His name is Captain Fin. He's very judgmental about punctuality.'

They ended up sitting on his front porch steps eating takeout tacos while Alex told her about his goldfish's tragic backstory (won at a carnival, survived for three years despite all odds) and Maya confessed about her eyeliner failure and how she felt like everyone else had gotten some manual on how to be a teenager that she'd missed.

'Dude,' Alex said, 'we're all just pretending. Tyler's terrified his parents will find out about the parties. Sarah's scared she'll forget her lines. I'm pretty sure my goldfish is faking being impressed by my monologues.'

Maya looked at him—really looked at him. 'You talk to your fish?'

'Only when I need to vent. He's an excellent listener. Never interrupts.'

She didn't know if this was the start of something or just a weird detour in an already bizarre night. But for the first time since stepping into that cafeteria, she didn't feel like a confused squirrel or a bear or any of it.

She just felt like a person who might actually figure this out eventually.

'So,' Alex said, 'same time tomorrow? Captain Fin could use the company.'

Maya smiled. 'I'll bring better snacks.'