Operation Poolside

My life is basically one long failed reconnaissance mission. I'm that girl at parties who camps against the wall with a Solo cup, observing everyone else actually living their lives. It's exhausting being a professional accidental spy.

Tonight's target: Jordan's pool party. The invite said "bring a swimsuit," which lol, absolutely not. My anxiety responds to bathing suits like a vampire responds to sunlight.

The pool lights cut through the water, turning everything blue and magical. Jordan's doing that thing where they float on their back, hair fanning out like a actual mermaid, while everyone sits on the edge laughing at something I'm definitely not part of. I'm three chairs away, clutching my phone like it contains the nuclear launch codes.

Then this freshman, Leo, appears out of nowhere holding a literal goldfish bowl. "Hey, sorry, Jordan's parents said someone had to watch him."

"Him?" I ask, because what.

"Bubbles. They're at some fancy dinner and didn't want to leave him alone."

So now I'm bonded with this random freshman by shared goldfish-sitting duty, which is honestly the most on-brand thing that's ever happened to me. We end up on the pool deck, both of us fully dressed and socially awkward, watching a fish swim in tiny circles while Jordan does pool tricks that make everyone scream.

"You ever feel like Bubbles?" Leo asks out of nowhere. "Just kinda ... going around in circles?"

I look at him, really look at him, and realize he gets it. The social anxiety. The feeling that everyone else got the manual to being a teenager and you're just improvising.

"Every single day," I say.

Jordan splashes water at us and yells, "COME IN, the pool's literally perfect!"

I freeze. But then Leo shrugs, kicks off his slides, and jumps in fully clothed.

"YOLO," he says, surfacing with a grin.

And something in me snaps. I ditch my phone, kick off my sandals, and cannonball into the deep end. The water's shocking and perfect and everyone's cheering and for once, I'm not spying on my own life from the sidelines.

I'm actually in it.