Green Smoothie Incident

Maya had been down bad for Jordan since October, which was pathetic even by her own standards. So when he finally asked to hang after soccer practice, she did what any rational person would do: she panicked and bought a spinach smoothie because she read somewhere that green juice made you look 'effortlessly healthy.' Spoiler: it doesn't. It makes you look like you're drinking liquid lawn.

She was already running late—literally running, because her mom had borrowed her car and the bus was 'experiencing delays.' Her track coach would be proud of her sprint form, less so of the fact that she was clutching a sloshing cup of vegetable sludge while sprinting toward the coffee shop where Jordan was waiting.

Her iPhone buzzed in her pocket. Jordan: 'hey im here :)'

Maya: 'omw! 2 mins'

Maya, physically: still three blocks away, sweat forming, heart doing something that wasn't just cardio.

She burst through the door, hair everywhere, smoothie precariously balanced. Jordan looked up from his phone and smiled—that genuine, crinkly-eyed one that made her stomach do things she didn't want to analyze.

'Hey!' He stood up. 'You look—'

'Like I just ran a marathon?' Maya finished, mortified.

'I was gonna say flushed, but sure.' His grin widened. 'What's that?' He pointed at her smoothie.

'Oh, just...' Maya debated lying. 'Spinach. I'm into wellness now.' She gestured vaguely with the cup, which chose that exact moment to explode green sludge down her white shirt.

They both stared at the disaster.

Then Jordan started laughing. Not mean laughing—real, bent-over laughter, the kind where you can't breathe. Maya started too, because what else could she do? This was it. This was the moment her crush died, suffocated by kale-based trauma.

'You know,' Jordan said finally, wiping his eyes, 'I tried a spinach smoothie once and threw up in a Target parking lot.'

'No way.'

'My brother has it on video somewhere. He threatens to post it every birthday.' He pulled out his phone. 'We should get you a napkin. Also, maybe we skip the health vibes and get actual food?'