Goldfish in the Backhand - Every Minute a Story

My stupid orange hat kept slipping over my eyes at exactly the wrong moment — like when Jake Martinez walked onto the padel court. I adjusted it, probably making it look worse, and tried to look like I belonged. Which I definitely didn't.

"You play?" Jake asked, nodding at my racket.

"Uh, yeah. Sometimes."

Liar. I'd watched exactly three YouTube tutorials at 2 AM last night.

The problem wasn't the padel. The problem was that Jake Martinez didn't know I existed until twenty seconds ago, and suddenly I was supposed to be this athletic, cool version of myself that definitely wasn't real. My actual self was still recovering from that time in seventh grade when I'd thrown up after eating an entire bag of vitamin gummies because I thought more vitamins meant more energy. (They don't.)

"You're up," someone said.

I stepped onto the court, heart hammering. Jake's crew — the ones who sat at the good lunch tables — were watching. This was it. My chance to finally be someone.

First serve came at me fast. I swung.

The racket flew out of my hand. It sailed over the fence, into the parking lot, and landed with a pathetic clatter.

Everyone stared. I felt my face burning hotter than that time I'd brought a goldfish to school for show-and-tell and it jumped out of the bowl during my presentation. Why did I always become the story?

But then Jake started laughing. Not mean laughter — the kind where you're actually embarrassed for someone else but also kind of impressed by how badly they screwed up.

"That was legendary," he said, grinning. "I'm Jake."

"Maya."

"Wanna get your racket and try again? I can teach you some actual physics."

I stood there, my orange hat crooked, my dignity somewhere in the parking lot with my racket, and realized: maybe the cooler version of myself wasn't the one who could play. Maybe it was the one who could fail spectacularly and not run away.

"Yeah," I said. "Yeah, I do."

Somewhere in that moment, I stopped wanting to fit in. I started wanting to stand out — goldfish disasters and all.