chlorine butterflies

The pool deck was packed — end-of-summer house party, chaos mode. My iphone buzzed in my pocket like crazy. group chat blowing up about the new padel courts opening downtown, but i couldn't focus. my stomach was doing full gymnastics.

because maya was here.

she'd spent july at camp and came back different — taller, confident, wearing a swimsuit that made my brain short-circuit. she was by the deep end, laughing at something jake said. jake, whose entire personality was being good at sports and having perfect hair.

i hung back by the patio furniture, scrolling through nothing on my phone. classic move. justin's dog — a golden retriever named max who shed everywhere — bounded over and knocked my sprite into the grass.

"bro, really?" i sighed.

"there you are!" maya's voice behind me. i turned around way too fast. "you've been hiding all day."

"not hiding. just... strategically positioned."

"uh-huh." she nudged my arm with hers. "want to see something weird?"

before i could process that she was touching my arm, she led me inside the house. her parents' room. a massive fish tank dominated one corner, glowing soft blue.

"they call him gerald," she whispered. "the goldfish."

"gerald?"

"he outlived three other fish. my dad's obsessed with him now. says gerald understands him better than anyone." she laughed, and i couldn't help but smile too. "sometimes i come in here when everything feels like too much. gerald doesn't ask questions. he just... swims."

we stood there watching the orange fish dart around plastic plants. the party noise outside faded to a hum.

"hey," she said quietly. "i missed you this summer."

my heart did something extremely embarrassing. "yeah?"

"yeah." she looked at me, really looked at me, for the first time since she got back. "you're my favorite person, you know that?"

the moment stretched, electric and terrifying.

"maya!" someone yelled from outside. "padel tournament starting!"

she rolled her eyes but didn't move away. "some other time, gerald."

back outside, everything was different. or maybe i was different. maya dragged me toward the new courts they'd set up on the lawn, and when jake handed me a racket, i didn't overthink it. i swung and missed spectacularly, and maya laughed so hard she spit out her drink.

and somehow that was better than being cool.

later, max shook himself off right next to me, spraying pool water everywhere.

"dude!" i protested, but i was grinning.

my phone buzzed again. group chat: 'where r u??'

i typed back: 'found something better.'

and left it at that.